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A young doctor-to-be i am

- bismillah - 

I read this somewhere over the internet. 

There is a boy from a poor family who wanted to be a doctor but the tuition fees are damn freaking high to get a medical degree. In order to achieve his dream to be a doctor and enter university, he had to make sure he did very well in his studies so that he could earn a full scholarship to enter medical school and also to continue receiving the scholarship while in the university. So this young boy read every page of his text books 20 times! Today this doctor is highly respected in his field and my friend is very grateful to him for saving his father's life. 

The above italics excerpt was taken from www.ringgitwisefool.blogspot.com

Sounds familiar for me though. 

I suffered academic downfall, from among the top students in school, state and i guess the country, i sat timidly in class and in exam during my preclinical years. The first semester on the first year, i manage to obtain 90+ for all of the subjects. I am not bragging but i am reminiscing. These gave me a very comfort zone. But then, things changed. i got only half for histology first exam. It sanked my heart. I almost in despair. Indeed i was. But alhamdulillah Allah is so merciful to mend the situation. He gave me strength and confidence, i finish my first year with 84.5 cgpa. Alhamdulillah. 

Second year was tough. In third year, i was doing better and i finally found my breath in medicine. Alhamdulillah. 

Forth year, i 'suffered' with lacks of motivation. Going to the hospital every morning is like going to the battlefield, or much harder. It felt so hard and i was lazy. Yeah that's the word. I didnt perform very well in the introductory course (come on, it is just intro, i should've scored very high!), the first rotation is very blurry and struggling with language barrier. Then, in the second rotation a doctor once said, harshly, that i am not active in the group. I was so deeply makan dalam that the last days of that rotation were the best days i spent in my 4th year clinical year. i stand beside every doctor whenever they are doing group discussion so that i can participate! (The reason why i dont get involve before that was because i cant hear clearly, arabnglish, and what more to comprehend and answer any point out question??) and alhamdulillah, things are getting better in my last and third rotation. I manage to participate well, as up to my own expectations. I performed very well and i enjoyed my ward rounds, but in my oral exam i was not so lucky that i got unexpected question, well i take that as Allah expect me to know more and better than others. I consider my self lucky. So next time, i just have to have more than others. More reading, more studying, more praying. In shaa Allah. 

Alhamdulillah. 

Now, i am entering the fifth year in shaa Allah. I hope to have this momentum, getting better each day. Allahumma aslihli. 

Pray for me that i become a very excellent doctor in Islam under Allah's mercy and guidance. Amiin. 

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