Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Orang Jauh

- bismillah -

(Takziah pada semua yang terlibat dalam mh370. Hanya Allah sebaik2 pemberi kekuatan di sebalik ujian ini.)

Ibu, ayah dan keluarga berada 8000km jauh dariku. 
Dari usia belasan mengenjak ke 20-an, aku membesar dari seorang remaja kepada seorang awal dewasa. 
Tanpa mereka yang terdekat di sisiku. 

Suasana sekeliling menjadi acuan memberi bentuk,
pada sekeping jasad dan ruh yang tertiup. 
Isinya tumbuh dengan didikan kasih sayang dan penuh hormat
dari kedua tangan ibu dan ayah
yang terbina dari rumah berhadapan sawah. 

Aku tidak sedar. 
Tapi sedikit demi sedikit erti kehidupan menjadi perencah dalam hidupku seharian. 
Aku belajar menguruskan diri. 
Aku bertatih membina survival, agar terus hidup. 
Memikirkan makanan, pakaian dan tempat tinggal. Juga kesihatan. 
Menguruskan jual beli dan sewaan. 
Aku belajar menjadi dewasa. 
Sungguh perubahan alam ini bukan mainan dan angan-angan. 

Tanpa aku sedar, 
Kedewasaan itu tiba juga 
walau jauh di hatiku masih merindu 
dan belum pula aku puas bermanja. 
Kasih mereka sampai, 
tapi aku masih kekontangan. 
Pada fikiranku, aku bukan dewasa lagi. 

Masa terus berlalu. 
Sudah 3 tahun aku hidup sendiri. 
Bertemankan kawan dan lawan,
berbekalkan azam dan iltizam, 
berpandukan pengalaman dan cubaan. 

Akan sampai suatu masa, 
Aku harus berlari mengejar realiti. 
Menuju dewasa pada dinihari, 
bukan lagi anak kecil yang hanya penting diri. 

Maafkan aku ibu, 
Memilih belajar jauh darimu. 
Maafkan aku ayah, 
Aku melalui jalan yang payah. 
Maafkan aku kakak, 
Andai membuat dadamu sesak. 
Maafkan aku abang,
Doakan adikmu ini terus cemerlang. 

Apabila aku memilih untuk menerima dan menyayangi, 
Maka aku harus bersedia untuk kehilangan dan perpisahan. 

Oh hati, terbukalah untuk menerima. 
Bersedialah untuk kehilangan.
Berserahlah untuk segala ketentuan. 

3 comments:

  1. YES, kita semua akan mati dan berpisah sementara. Jom prepare utk make sure kat syurga nanti kita semua bole together2 balik forever....amin. Yg aku risau, to make sure all of us able to gather together at jannah.....semoga Allah pelihara akidah kita semua sebaik nya dan kita semua tergolong dlm golongan beriman hingga ke syurga. Amin.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Good morning, how are you?

    My name is Emilio, I am a Spanish boy and I live in a town near to Madrid. I am a very interested person in knowing things so different as the culture, the way of life of the inhabitants of our planet, the fauna, the flora, and the landscapes of all the countries of the world etc. in summary, I am a person that enjoys travelling, learning and respecting people's diversity from all over the world.

    I would love to travel and meet in person all the aspects above mentioned, but unfortunately as this is very expensive and my purchasing power is quite small, so I devised a way to travel with the imagination in every corner of our planet. A few years ago I started a collection of used stamps because trough them, you can see pictures about fauna, flora, monuments, landscapes etc. from all the countries. As every day is more and more difficult to get stamps, some years ago I started a new collection in order to get traditional letters addressed to me in which my goal was to get at least 1 letter from each country in the world. This modest goal is feasible to reach in the most part of countries, but unfortunately, it is impossible to achieve in other various territories for several reasons, either because they are very small countries with very few population, either because they are countries at war, either because they are countries with extreme poverty or because for whatever reason the postal system is not functioning properly.

    For all this, I would ask you one small favour:
    Would you be so kind as to send me a letter by traditional mail from Jordan? I understand perfectly that you think that your blog is not the appropriate place to ask this, and even, is very probably that you ignore my letter, but I would call your attention to the difficulty involved in getting a letter from that country, and also I don’t know anyone neither where to write in Jordan in order to increase my collection. a letter for me is like a little souvenir, like if I have had visited that territory with my imagination and at same time, the arrival of the letters from a country is a sign of peace and normality and an original way to promote a country in the world. My postal address is the following one:

    Emilio Fernandez Esteban
    Avenida Juan de la Cierva, 44
    28902 Getafe (Madrid)
    Spain

    If you wish, you can visit my blog www.cartasenmibuzon.blogspot.com where you can see the pictures of all the letters that I have received from whole World.

    Finally, I would like to thank the attention given to this letter, and whether you can help me or not, I send my best wishes for peace, health and happiness for you, your family and all your dear beings.

    Yours Sincerely

    Emilio Fernandez

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i'll forward this to my friends..

      Delete

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